


two for the price of one (the more, the merrier)

by sobsicles



Series: Shadow Soulmates [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Coming Untouched, Jace cares a lot, Light D/s undertones, M/M, Multi, Pet Names, Pining, Raphael is asexual, Set in canon, Simon is lovely, Soulmates, a very loose walk through canon, and Raphael is a puzzle, as always, but he pretends not to, go figure, he is also the only one who isnt a dumbass, help me, never explicitly stated but very much implied, primarily focused on the relationships here, so canon, these three fit so well???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-19 06:42:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22406914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sobsicles/pseuds/sobsicles
Summary: Jace doesn't say anything for a long moment. His own eyes flick down to his wrists against his own will. He's wearing his gloves again. They hide both names, but he has makeup over them for good measure. He does his best not to look at them anymore, but sometimes, when no one is around and he's feeling especially lost, he smears the makeup away and stares at the names. They make him feel lonely and angry, but they also soothe something in him that he can't put a name to.~~~When 'Simon Lewis' curls in an elegant scrawl on the inside of Jace's right wrist, he is pissed.
Relationships: Simon Lewis/Raphael Santiago/Jace Wayland
Series: Shadow Soulmates [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1362943
Comments: 36
Kudos: 330
Collections: Hunter's Moon Fic Recs





	two for the price of one (the more, the merrier)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TobytheWise](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TobytheWise/gifts).



> So, this fic was supposed to come out a long time ago, following the first installment of the series, but life got ahold of me--that and I was writing so much Jimon (Jace x Simon) fic that I sort of just put it off, whoops. 
> 
> But...I think it's best that it's been a little while because my writing has improved with time, and I was able to handle this fic properly. 
> 
> This was originally an idea I threw at Toby, my love and soulbatai, and they gave me their unwavering support. They've waited for this fic a long time bahaha. 
> 
> You don't technically need to read the first fic to understand this one, but I recommend it. However, for a quick run-down if you wish to skip it: Malec as Soulmates, set mostly in s1, walking through their relationship if they'd been soulmates from thr beginning (which, lets be honest, they were). They formed a deeper, rare connection that let them have each other's traits--Alec got magic and immortality, and Magnus recieved the ability to hold Alec's weapons and possibly take on runes. Cute, little fic, you should go read :D
> 
> With that being said, I've rambled far too much, so without further ado...
> 
> Enjoy ;)

When  **_Simon Lewis_ ** curls in an elegant scrawl on the inside of Jace's right wrist, he is  _ pissed.  _

He doesn't notice it until he's leading Clary and Simon into the institute. He finds enough time to go to Izzy's room and get her pale foundation she uses for certain undercover missions. He traces the name, bitterness in his throat, and doesn't take one steady breath until the name is hidden away. 

There are multiple reasons Jace is pissed by this new and abrupt development. He thinks of his father, of what Michael Wayland would say, and he feels shame sour in his stomach for being weak. He thinks about the fact that he's never, not once, looked at a boy in such a manner, and he tries to figure out what that means. He thinks about the fact that Simon Lewis is a mundane, about how utterly  _ unfair  _ that is, and he tells himself it's for the best. 

As far as Jace knows, no Shadowhunter has ever had a mundane for a soulmate. For obvious reasons, it wouldn't exactly work out. There is also the fact that mundanes don't  _ have  _ soulmates, not like those in the Shadow World. Jace has a name on his wrist, Simon's wrists are blank. 

Jace tells no one, acts like it isn't even there, curses his horrible luck, and pretends it doesn't hurt as much as it does. He clings to Clary, wants to want her so bad that it nearly steals his breath. She's beautiful and lovely, strong and fierce, and she looks at him like he's worth more than what he can  _ do.  _

Simon looks at Jace like he hates him, looks at Clary like he never wants to look away. Jace tries to hide how he looks--he knows the fond smiles break through sometimes, when Simon rambles, when Simon is visibly terrified but steadfast in his determination to support his best friend. 

When Simon holds a blade to Jace's throat, his wrists are blank and his eyes are blazing with anger. In that moment, Jace is not confused about himself at all. He taunts, he eggs Simon on, and he thinks about kissing him roughly. Jace realizes then that there is a lot he doesn't know about himself, a lot he never thought to explore. 

Then, Simon dies. 

Jace's wrist goes blank, the name fading as if it never even existed. He stares at his blank wrist and he tries to work out how he feels about it. He supposes he should feel grateful. He can want Clary now, properly. Except, of course, he  _ doesn't.  _

Jace has met Raphael in passing, but they've never actually looked at each other in the eyes. Jace doesn't even think they've shared one word between them before. But when Raphael explains what could happen to Simon, meets Jace's gaze head on to answer his questions, he thinks that the vampire looks slightly regretful himself. Raphael lightly rubs his right wrist as he leaves the room, not seeming to notice  **_Jace Wayland_ ** curling into his left. 

Heart thumping wildly, Jace stares down at his own left wrist, his mouth going dry when he sees  **_Raphael Santiago_ ** coming to life on his skin. 

Naturally, Jace is pissed all over again. He loses one soulmate he didn't even want, only to gain another that he  _ also  _ doesn't want. He tugs his gloves down to hide his wrists and goes with Clary to talk to Simon's mom. 

In the end, Clary can't do it, can't let Simon go, and Jace doesn't know whether to be relieved by that or not. When Raphael walks up with Simon in his arms, his eyes find Jace's for a brief moment, then slip away. His wrists are blank, but when he passes Simon over, they both tense at the jolt that runs through them. Jace does not meet Raphael's eyes. 

Jace knows Simon will live before Simon even rises from his grave. He stands behind Clary and looks at his right wrist, frowning at it. There's a reason Raphael's name is on his left, there has to be. Jace tells himself he's not hopeful, tells himself he isn't reaching, tries to stop himself from throwing up a prayer and does it anyway. 

Just before Simon's hand breaks through the dirt, Raphael crosses himself. And when he kisses his fingers, his eyes raise to meet Jace's. Both of their right wrists are on display, and in perfect unison,  **_Simon Lewis_ ** comes back to life on their skin. 

When Raphael chases Simon into the night, it's all Jace can do not follow them. 

Jace goes home and misses Alec. He wants to talk to someone, to explain the war going on in his head, to hash this out with someone who can't just up and leave him for it. Jace stands in front of his mirror, swipes away the makeup, and stares at the names. 

**_Raphael Santiago. Simon Lewis._ **

Jace knows--and is furious about it--that people rarely, if ever, get two names at once. Usually, two soulmates don't exist at the same time for one person. But here Jace is, an anomaly as he always has been, two names on his wrist, and he hates himself and them for it. 

Both names are men. Both names are vampires. 

Jace really wants to punch something. 

But he can't dwell on it, can't let it be a distraction. Clary needs him, and she's the least complicated thing in his life right now, so he comes to a decision. He makes Clary his mission, lets himself wish it was her name on his wrist instead, and decides to end this mess once and for all. 

It's late at night when he makes it to Hotel Dumort. They're smack dead in the middle of looking for the cup, but things have come to a lull. Jace has this moment to fix this shit, to put it to an end, and he plans to do just that. Everything is falling apart in his life right now--he and Alec are on outs, Izzy is too focused trying to please Maryse, and Jace considers cutting his own hands off at least twice a day. He's done with it, all of it. 

Jace stands firm at the entrance, waiting. There's a buzz beneath his skin and he forces himself not to get worked up. It takes a few minutes before someone blurs to a stop before him. It's Raphael, and Jace doesn't know why he's surprised. 

He'd expected Simon. 

“Shadowhunter,” Raphael greets calmly, dressed in a nice suit, not a hair out of place. His eyes are dark, nearly black, and focused right on Jace with intent. There's an amused air about him, as if he's laughing at Jace for no reason. “I take it you're here about those…not-so-blank wrists of yours?” 

Jace holds his ground. “What did you tell Simon?” 

“The truth,” Raphael replies simply, his head tilting to the side slightly. “He's been lied to enough.” 

“I'm sure he took that well,” Jace mutters, nose wrinkling as he imagines it. 

Raphael's head straightens. “Fledglings are very testy in the beginning. Their emotions ride high, they can't really control them, and that's not even the worst of what they deal with. He took it well, considering.” 

“Right.” Jace takes a deep breath, shoving his hands behind his back, standing at attention. “This is probably some kind of joke to you. I mean, you've probably had soulmates before--” 

“I haven't,” Raphael cuts him off sharply, eyes sinking into slits. 

That makes Jace pause. “You--how old are you?” he blurts, curious despite himself. 

Raphael arches an eyebrow. “Old, compared to you and the baby. Not old, compared to some of the immortal. But that is not what matters. Some go centuries without a soulmate.” 

“Have you?” Jace shoots back. 

“Decades,” Raphael amends. 

Jace tries not to imagine what that would be like. He's only in his twenties. From what Raphael said, he hasn't lived a century, but he's lived decades--all of which he never found a soulmate. To go from that, from having no soulmates, to having two out of nowhere…well, Jace figures it can't be easy. 

But Jace isn't trying to  _ sympathize  _ with Raphael, he's trying to make it clear that nothing will ever happen. 

“Look, I didn't come here for a bonding experience. I came here to tell you that whatever ideas you or Simon might have…they're never going to happen. You two can carry on however you want, I don't care, but leave me out of it.” 

“You assume that he wants either of us, that I want either of you. Simon was right, you are entitled.” 

Jace blinks. “What, I'm not--he said that? Okay, first of all, I'm not  _ entitled.  _ Second, I'm just trying to clear up any confusion there might be. I'm not assuming anything, I'm just being proactive.” 

“No need.” Raphael does not smile, doesn't look like he's capable, but his lips twitch faintly. “No one wants you, Jace Wayland, and we certainly don't want one another either.” 

For some reason, that makes Jace's stomach flip, like a stone has suddenly been dropped in his gut. He grinds his teeth, tells himself that this is a  _ good  _ thing, and digs his nails into his palms behind his back. It doesn't feel like a slap to the face, it  _ doesn't. _

“You can't tell anyone,” Jace snaps roughly, staring at Raphael head on. “He can't either.” 

Raphael hums in a mocking way. “Worried baby is going to spill your horrible secret?” 

Jace does not like the way Raphael calls Simon  _ baby  _ with such familiarity. He doesn't like the way Simon has a nickname, but all he gets is a look of contempt. Jace huffs a harsh breath, tells himself that it's just a soulmate thing, that it doesn't matter. 

“Not worried. If he does, I'll kill him.” 

The moment those words fall from his lips, Jace regrets them. It isn't true, he'd never actually  _ kill  _ Simon for that, but he says it anyway because he wishes that it was something he could mean. As soon as the sentence finishes, Raphael flits closer, getting right in his face, expression stony and hovering close. 

Jace inhales sharply and goes to move back, but his whole body locks up. Raphael doesn't exactly intimidate Jace, though he pulls off the whole threatening aura frighteningly well. But he's very close, so close that Jace wants to lean away, even if his body doesn't allow him to. 

“You  _ Shadowhunters,”  _ Raphael hisses, spitting the word like poison. “You think you're better than us because of angel blood. You are not the one burdened with our names,  _ we  _ are burdened with yours. And if you  _ ever  _ threaten someone in my clan again, soulmate or no, I will not hesitate to rip my name right off your wrist, with my  _ teeth,  _ as you so clearly despise it.” 

Jace does not think it is healthy, or normal, to get hot and bothered by one of his soulmates threatening him. It certainly doesn't help the confusion he feels about himself. 

“Just--just keep it to yourselves,” Jace croaks, inwardly wincing at the rasp in his voice--he'd meant to speak strongly, but that doesn't work out. 

Raphael watches him walk away with a blank expression, his dark eyes following him up the street. Jace forces himself not to look back. 

* * *

Jace doesn't see Raphael again until they all come together to save Meliorn. Simon's there too, looking much better and less like he hates himself. Jace stands between Izzy and Clary, very firmly keeping his gaze away from Raphael and Simon. 

Soulmates all around and each of their wrists are blank. Jace finds himself wondering if Simon and Raphael use the same shade of makeup to hide their wrists from the world. He promptly shoves that thought away and watches the werewolves and vampires bicker with hostility. It's amusing to see, especially when Raphael keeps up with Luke, remark for remark, lips curling into a smirk. 

Things are fine, until they aren't. The moment a werewolf shoves into Simon, Raphael hisses and shoves forward. The rest of his clan back him up immediately. Jace doesn't realize he's tense and stepping forward too until Luke calls off his growling pack, sighing like he's surrounded by a bunch of tantrum-throwing toddlers. The tension doesn't melt away, but Jace forces himself not to care; soulmates or not, he can't feel the need to protect either of them.

Later, in the midst of fighting, Jace somehow ends up bumping into Simon. It's the first time they've touched since Simon came back as a vampire. They both go still as a tingle shoots through them, the contact of soulmates like a live wire under their skin. Their eyes lock, and Jace sucks in a sharp breath. 

"Raphael said that would happen," Simon mutters, blinking in surprise, his throat bobbing. 

Jace frowns. "Only once." 

"Is that why you stopped touching me?" Simon blurts out, eyebrows crumbling together. "You used to, before I--before. And you don't anymore." 

"I touched you because you don't know how to stay still," Jace snaps, scowling. "You were always running off, running  _ towards  _ the danger, and I had to stop you from getting yourself killed." 

"Because I was your soulmate?" 

"Because you're an idiot." 

Simon's lips twitch, but then he looks incredibly somber, his face falling. "But I died anyway." 

"Yeah." 

"What did it feel like? When I died, I mean." 

Jace doesn't say anything for a long moment. His own eyes flick down to his wrists against his own will. He's wearing his gloves again. They hide both names, but he has makeup over them for good measure. He does his best not to look at them anymore, but sometimes, when no one is around and he's feeling especially lost, he smears the makeup away and stares at the names. They make him feel lonely and angry, but they also soothe something in him that he can't put a name to. 

Jace remembers Simon dying, remembers the name fading from his wrist. It had been horrifying--the blank skin like a beacon to something tragic. And the pain hadn't been welcome either. His wrist had burned as the name slipped away. But the worst part was how empty he'd felt before Raphael's name claimed his other wrist. 

Jace releases a haggard sigh. "It felt like a little bit of me died too." 

"Raphael said the same thing," Simon murmurs, lips tipping down. "So, this is--it's all there is, isn't it? We're all stuck with each other until--until we die?" 

"It's not a guidebook, Simon." 

"Well, it certainly isn't a _suggestion._ It's names on my _skin,_ names that mean our souls are connected." 

Jace grimaces. "This doesn't have to influence us, it definitely doesn't change anything for me." 

Simon looks conflicted, opens his mouth to reply, but Jace just walks away and leaves that lie hanging in the air behind him. 

* * *

Jace knows the moment that Valentine finds out about the names on his wrists. 

He walks into the room, waving away the brute that had been beating Jace like it's his job--which it is. Deliriously, Jace wonders if Valentine pays him. When Valentine comes to a halt in front of him, his arms crossed, Jace immediately knows. 

It's incredibly strange to see Michael Wayland's disappointment on Valentine's face. That, more than anything, tells Jace what he wishes wasn't true  _ is.  _ Valentine is his father, is the man who raised him, is the man who abandoned him. There's far too many similarities between the two for Jace to try and convince himself otherwise. 

Jace feels like he's been in a perpetual state of confusion and anger ever since Clary walked into his life, and along with her, Simon. Nothing has made sense after that, but this is worse because it's not confusing at all. 

Michael Wayland and Valentine Morgenstern have merged into the same person in Jace's mind, two layers becoming one, an overlayed image finally becoming clear. He can't unsee it, can't erase it from his mind, can't even find himself surprised by it. Valentine  _ is  _ Michael Wayland, and Jace feels so many things about that revelation. 

Everything that comes with it, that Clary is actually his sister--and isn't that just his luck?--and the fact that demon blood flows in his veins, it makes Jace so endlessly  _ exhausted.  _ He's been yanked in too many directions in too short of a time. He can't, and doesn't want to, process it all. 

Valentine hums quietly and reaches up to tug his hands back in their chains, reading the names on his wrist. The makeup had smudged away under sweat and movement from the force of the hits he took. He just stares at Valentine, watches the look of disdain bloom deeper on his face. Because of that reaction, because Valentine is put out, for the first time since they appeared, he finds himself thankful for the names he's gotten. 

"Disgraceful," Valentine mutters, dropping his hands from Jace's, shaking his head. 

Jace hates the way his stomach curls in anxiety and despair at Valentine's disappointment. He abruptly feels as if he's a child again, as if he's watching his father snap his falcon's throat, and he has a deep seated ache to just  _ prove himself.  _ The feeling rocks within him, much like the boat rocks with the waves, and it makes him sick. He hates it, he rails against it, and he  _ refuses  _ to care what this horrible man thinks about him. 

"I don't know," Jace croaks out, his breathing labored from the earlier assault, "they kind of grew on me, if we're being honest here." 

Valentine presses his lips into a thin line, sighing heavily. "The bond of a Soulmate is a gift from the Angels. I remember being so confused why those with demon blood would ever be granted such a gift. But you're aware that demons are derived from Angels--they're the ones that fell, the ones that deserve to be squandered." 

"A history lesson, great," Jace rasps sarcastically. 

"Raphael Santiago," Valentine murmurs, tilting his head. "I've been informed that he's a vampire. And that Simon Lewis--the best friend of Clarissa, a recently turned vampire as well. Do you know what this proves, Jonathon?" 

"All that's coming to mind is that I'm so hot that I need two soulmates who stay young and attractive forever to match up to me," Jace says tiredly, eyes sagging as he leans his head over on his arm. 

Valentine reaches out and grips his chin, fingers digging into his cheeks roughly. He leans forward with an icy cruelness in his gaze. "It proves that you are nothing more than an  _ abomination.  _ The blood that flows in your veins, it makes you worthy of monsters and nothing more." 

Jace jerks his head from Valentine's grip, a surge of energy suddenly flowing into him. It doesn't matter that Jace doesn't like his soulmates, doesn't matter that he's been ashamed of them himself, doesn't even matter that he finds himself agreeing just slightly. He is  _ not  _ going to let Valentine turn Raphael and Simon into mere stains on this world. Spite flares to life within him. 

"I'm more inclined to claim them than I am to claim  _ you.  _ If they're monsters, you're evil incarnate. I'd rather have them as soulmates in every life I'll live than have you as a father," Jace spits, leaning forward to bare his teeth in Valentine's face. 

Valentine simply smiles. "Say what you want, but you are my son; I  _ raised  _ you. You know, deep down, that you've been cursed with those names. You're ashamed of them, as you should be." 

Jace drops his head. Valentine makes a small noise of approval, as if that movement was some form of agreement. Jace lets him think it, lets him believe what he wants to. He's not trying to prove anything anymore, possibly too tired to do so. 

The fact remains:

Jace isn't ashamed because they're men, or even because they're downworlders. He's ashamed because, despite everything he thought about himself, he desperately wants to be loved. 

_ To be loved is to be destroyed,  _ he knows, and he thinks that maybe he wants both at the same time. 

* * *

Life continues on, each trial harder than the last. 

Most things are okay, considering where this all started. Alec is happy, at least. He and Magnus seem to be getting along wonderfully. Perhaps it's that they're soulmates, but Jace can't think of any couple more suited for each other. 

That stings, just a bit. 

Magnus, however, is a gracious host. Despite the fact that Jace just kind of barges in, he is more than accommodating. But hey, he has Jace's parabatai on his wrist, which means he basically signed up for this. Jace tells Magnus that and only gets an amused look for his troubles. 

Things are mostly fine, right up until Jace bumps into Simon in Magnus' loft at nearly two in the morning. He's heading into the kitchen for a glass of water and smacks right into Simon on his way in. 

Jace stops. Simon stops. 

"Oh, did I wake you?" Simon asks awkwardly. 

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Jace blurts out, feeling out of place in nothing but some loose joggers and a head of messy hair. 

Simon clears his throat. "Magnus said I could use his shower. Well, actually, Luke talked to Magnus for me because he didn't want me having to sneak back into my old house, and the boathouse doesn't actually have a lot of accommodations as far as that goes. Magnus gave me the green light, so I just came by for a quick shower." 

Jace stares at him. He's not entirely sure what the fuck is going on with everything that just came out of Simon's mouth. If he wasn't basically shoved out of the Institute, he'd probably know all this by now from Clary. But, as it stands, he doesn't know shit. 

"What boathouse?" Jace asks carefully. 

"The one behind the Jade Wolf. Uh, I moved in a little while ago, but it's still a work in progress." 

"Simon,  _ why  _ did you move into a boathouse directly beside a large pack of werewolves who are, as you must know, your hereditary enemies?" 

"My options were limited," Simon mutters, crossing his arms and clearing his throat. 

Jace arches an eyebrow. "What, you couldn't pay rent at the Dumort anymore and Raphael kicked you out? Somehow, I find that hard to believe." 

Simon's silent for a moment. Then, with tension tight in his tone, he grits out, "More likely than you think. I've, uh, been banned from Hotel Dumort." 

"What," Jace blurts flatly, the word not even a question, more of an accusation. "Wow, you really couldn't afford rent, huh? I mean, you could have always asked for a loan. You'd be surprised--" 

"It wasn't rent." Simon's head snaps up, his eyes wide with annoyance. "I betrayed Raphael to try and save you from Valentine." 

Jace blinks. He must look startled because Simon's annoyance seems to seep away slowly. As the seconds tick by, Jace tries to process that. He'd heard about Camille's release, heard that Clary and others had a hand in it, but he hadn't even stopped to consider that Simon was included in that. It makes his brain feel like it's trying to implode on itself. Why would Simon  _ do  _ that? 

Jace swallows. "Why?" 

"I didn't… I mean, I wasn't blatantly betraying him. I never wanted to, but you were--and I couldn't just stand by while--" 

Simon seems incapable of finishing. 

"He must have been furious." 

"He was," Simon murmurs, face twisting into regret so starkly that Jace's palms itch with the urge to reach out and rearrange his features into something that reflected joy instead. 

"Were you two...um…" 

"Not in the way you're thinking. He's not--he isn't interested in...physical stuff. The term is asexual." 

"Oh." Jace frowns. "Wait, how do you know that?" 

Simon's lips quirk up as he lifts his head. "How do you think? I made a move, and he stopped me." 

"Must have been embarrassing." 

"Not really. He wasn't saying no to  _ me,  _ just to sex. Which, that's perfectly valid." 

"It is," Jace agrees cautiously, waiting for Simon to switch up and say that it's a bad thing. Sex is a major factor for many people, Jace knows that firsthand, and it's actually really fucking horrible to feel like that's all people care about. Except Simon seems completely sincere. "So, uh, you two...broke up then? Because of me?" 

Simon rolls his eyes. "Don't flatter yourself, Jace. We weren't actually together anyway. And it wasn't like I was  _ choosing.  _ I just didn't see the point in weighing your life against his sense of honor. That landed me here, but it was worth it. Clary was happy, at least." 

"Still," Jace says, "I'm sorry." 

Simon sighs. "Me too." 

* * *

Jace almost makes it into the Institute without interruption.  _ Almost.  _ One second, he's creeping along the side with his stele at the ready, plan heavy in his mind; the next second, Raphael is stepping out from the dark with his usual poise. 

"Where are you going?" Raphael asks simply. 

Jace stands up from his crouch. "You know the plan. I'm infiltrating a little early." 

"I see." Raphael's lips tip down, his eyes flicking down to the stele. "We should kill her, you know. Clary Fairchild's life does not outweigh the entirety of the downworld." 

"I know that. You won't have to kill her. There's another way." 

"And Simon?" 

Jace purses his lips. "Do you actually care about that? I mean, you did throw him out on the street." 

Raphael's eyes narrow. "You know  _ nothing  _ of Vampire customs. More than that, what he did was  _ wrong.  _ Do you think I wanted you to die? Camille was locked away for a reason. She should have stayed that way." 

Jace heaves a sigh. His mind is far too overworked to try and parse out if there is an argument worth having right now. Maybe Raphael is right, maybe Simon  _ did  _ fuck up majorly, but Jace is pretty sure that Raphael overreacted too. Whatever. What they do has nothing to do with him. 

"Look, I really don't have the time to argue with you right now," Jace admits, reaching up to push his hair out of his eyes. "I know you care, even if you say you don't, so let me reassure you. Simon will be fine, I'll make sure of it." 

"And how would you  _ know  _ such a thing?" Raphael challenges with an uptick of his eyebrow. 

Jace is going to be dead in about half an hour anyway, so he says, "Because, as much as I try not to, I care. About him, about you. It's ingrained in our souls, on our skin; we can't help it." 

Raphael's expression abruptly goes blank. His eyes, however, have opened wide and dark, displaying some emotion Jace doesn't recognize. Slowly, carefully, he asks, "Jace, what is this other plan you have?" 

"Don't worry about it," Jace murmurs, sighing quietly and averting his eyes. "Let's just say that you'll have one less person to worry about really soon." 

The second that passes after that statement is stifling and heavy, then Raphael is abruptly right in front of Jace. His eyes are still dark and magnetizing, drawing Jace's gaze with ease. Raphael reaches out and taps his own name on Jace's wrist, flicking up the glove like it offends him, and the contact steals Jace's breath right from his chest. 

"There are few things in this world I like more than order and neatness," Raphael informs him, his voice soft--not with the lull of honey that suggests fondness, but with a deceptively gentle curl of darkness. "I'm often pleased by so little, but I rather enjoy symmetry. There's a certain symmetry to having two blank wrists, as there is to having two names on them. It would be notably...regretful and truly irritating to lose such symmetry." 

Jace stares at him, his tongue feeling swollen in his mouth. He swallows, clears his throat, then swallows again. "Did you just ask me not to die because you like patterns?" 

Raphael smirks. "I am also very complex. Blame Magnus; he encouraged it. There are many layers to get through before you understand what I mean when I say certain things."

"You're my soulmate," Jace mutters, ignoring the jittery feeling in his stomach from admitting that out loud for the first time. "I think if anyone can figure it out, it's going to be me or Simon." 

"Our souls may recognize each other, but we don't know each other in any way outside of that." 

"I can take a crack at it." 

"Do your worst," Raphael says with an inclined head, his fingers still resting gently across Jace's left wrist. 

Jace licks his lips. "You'd miss me, or the idea of me. You don't want to feel like you're missing parts of yourself just because I died." 

"Hmm." Raphael tilts his head, staring at Jace intently, stepping closer. "I suppose being soulmates allows for a learning curve." 

"I won't promise anything. If this is the price I have to pay, I'll do it. Maybe this is why I'm your soulmate, why I'm Simon's. Maybe I'm made for this." 

"You believe in a preconceived destiny?" 

"I believe that soulmates can be a mistake, but only if you let it." Jace takes a deep breath and stares at Raphael intently. "There's a reason people are soulmates. Most people think it has to do with love, and maybe it does, but I think it's about the impact you'll have on the other person. Maybe Simon and you can be happy, maybe I'll be the catalyst to that." 

Raphael's fingers briefly squeeze his wrist, a spasming that he can't seem to control. "Do you honestly think we'd ever be capable of true happiness with the feeling that a part of ourselves has withered away in your absence?" 

"I don't know if anyone is capable of true happiness, if I'm honest. But maybe you'll get something close to it. Just the chance that you can, that Magnus can, that any downworlder can is enough for me to go through with this." 

"Logically, you are correct." 

"But," Jace prompts, arching an eyebrow. 

"But," Raphael agrees. 

Jace huffs a bitter laugh. "Like you said, one life doesn't outweigh the entirety of the downworld." 

"No, I said  _ Clary's  _ life didn't." 

"And what's so different between me and her?" 

Raphael says, "Her name is not on my wrist," and brushes a thumb over Jace's wrist with a flickering smile that's more sad than he is prepared for. 

Jace swallows and tries not to feel the utter relief threatening to strangle him. "That's a pretty big statement from a guy who hates Shadowhunters and thinks I'm entitled." 

"You are entitled and I do dislike Shadowhunters," Raphael confirms without an ounce of shame, lips curling into a smirk. "However, there are certain things that one comes to realize when they've been given the burden of endless time. When the world hands you an opportunity, it would be foolish to scoff at it. I do not want you, Jace, but I did not get a choice in the matter, and now, I do not want you to die. Even if it's for my affinity to symmetry." 

"Unfortunately," Jace murmurs, tugging his wrist away from Raphael's cool fingers, "we don't always get what we want." 

Raphael frowns at him. "Jace, I don't--" 

Jace takes a step back, heart hammering in his chest as he waves a hand. "I've got to go, okay? Just...just take care of Simon." 

With that, Jace turns around and sneaks away. 

* * *

"Stop  _ doing  _ that," Jace snaps, throwing Alec an annoyed look, which earns him a scowl. 

Alec twirls his finger, sending the pencil sailing through the air, circling Jace's head. "Hush, this is fun." 

"I can  _ feel  _ it when you do magic," Jace mutters, lips tipping down. "It's like this weird tingle through our bond. I don't like it." 

"I think you're just jealous." 

"Yeah, maybe a little." 

Alec smiles at him, dimple flashing in his cheek. "Magnus is teaching me how to make potions. I can give you one that will help you sleep." 

"How do you know I haven't been sleeping?" Jace mutters, narrowing his eyes. 

"I always know when you haven't been sleeping. You've been tired ever since you touched the Soul Sword." 

"Right." 

Jace doesn't explain that the Soul Sword isn't the reason he doesn't get much sleep at night. Being woken by intense dreams about Simon biting him, sometimes with Raphael joining in, both of them poised on either side of his neck...well, it's not something he's willing to discuss. That would also require him to tell Alec who his soulmates are, and that's definitely not happening. 

"Oh, hey, Simon is here," Alec says, pushing to his feet with a look of faint surprise. "Maybe Clary needs--oh, no, he's heading towards us." 

"Jace," Simon grits out as soon as he stomps up to them, his jaw clenched, "can I talk to you for a moment?" 

Jace frowns at him. "Kinda busy here, Simon." 

"It's important," Simon says, his eyes widening, gaze softening, and Jace is moving before he even knows what he's doing. He follows Simon without a word to Alec, heading outside where Simon drags him farther and farther away, then he whirls around to look Jace right in the eyes. "You need to give Raphael some of your blood." 

"I--what?" Jace jerks back. "Uh, no, I'm not doing that." 

"He doesn't have to bite you," Simon says, his voice taking on a pleading tone. "Just donate a little bit, let me give it to him. It--he needs it." 

"Why?" Jace asks sharply. 

Simon swallows. "You didn't see him, Jace. His sister, Rosa, she's getting older and sicker. He's terrified that she'll pass away during the day when he can't get to her. I--I won't tell him where I got it, I'll just--" 

"You and Raphael are, what, buddies now?" Jace mutters, casting his gaze around, crossing his arms and doing his best to ignore the way his chest squeezes. 

"Not...exactly. Actually, he threatened my life? Well, he probably does that to his friends, knowing him. My point  _ is,  _ he needs us, Jace," Simon tells him, his voice softening towards the end. "You were there for me when I needed you...so be there for him." 

"Do you have  _ any  _ idea how reckless--"

"He's your soulmate,  _ our  _ soulmate." 

Jace looks away, inhaling sharply as his heart gives a weak little pang. "Fuck," he mutters, eyebrows dipping down as he sighs. "This is a  _ really  _ bad idea." 

"Do it anyway?" Simon requests, stepping closer to Jace, licking his lips. "For me? For him?" 

"You think that has any kind of hold on me." 

"A little, yeah. I'm figuring you out." 

"Stop doing that," Jace warns. "You might not like what you learn." 

Simon's smile is warm. "I like what I've figured out so far. Maybe I'm biased, but…" 

"S'been a while since I saw you," Jace mumbles, looking down to his boots, clearing his throat. "Or him. You've, uh, been out of the loop with this whole Jonathan thing." 

"Clary told me. You...you killed him, that night on the bridge. Are you--well, it's kinda stupid to ask, but are you okay?" Simon murmurs warily. 

Jace hums, looking up to peer at Simon. "He was threatening lives. He used Izzy, after helping her with her addiction, taking her in after she jumped around from vampire to vampire. He fucked with Clary's head, broke her heart, blamed her for shit that wasn't her fault. It wasn't hard to kill him."

"Oh, that's--I mean, I'm glad that you're okay," Simon says, pushing his lips from side-to-side, watching Jace from the corner of his eye. "So...about the blood?" 

"I'll do it," Jace says, and Simon releases a soft sigh of relief. "But I'm coming with you." 

Simon looks up at him in surprise. "Wait, really? You're gonna give it to him in person? You--you want to see him?" he whispers. 

That is precisely the reason, but Jace forces himself to snort and say, "I'm just going to make sure you're not taking my blood to someone else." 

"I'd  _ never--"  _

"Come on, Simon, let's just go." 

Offended, Simon leads him away towards his van, keeping a wide berth from him. Jace doesn't acknowledge the regret he feels for being an asshole. They travel together in relative silence, but Jace can feel Simon glancing at him every now and then. Jace keeps his gaze focused out the window, but unbeknownst to Simon, he's actually looking at Simon's reflection rather than the passing scenery. 

They arrive at Hotel Dumort and take the back entrance in, keeping the sunlight from pouring in on any unsuspecting vampires. Jace keeps his hand on his holster, ready for a fight, even if he knows it's counterproductive. Raphael would be  _ pissed  _ if they took out any of his clan members just because they wanted a quick visit. Even still, Jace is prepared to protect himself and Simon if need be. In the end, he doesn't--the vampires they do intercept merely glare at them, but make no move to attack. 

"He's probably in his room," Simon whispers. 

Jace sweeps out a hand. "Lead the way. You're the one who knows where it is." 

Simon rolls his eyes but takes them up the stairs, looking around with a wistful expression. Jace wonders what room used to be his, what memories he has here. He doesn't ask, unwilling to sting Simon with that bout of nostalgia. Besides, it's not his place to ask. 

When they finally stop in front of a door, Jace has to knock because Simon looks like he's too nervous. They wait for a beat, Simon fidgeting, Jace rolling his eyes at Simon's anxiety. 

Raphael opens the door, takes one look at them, then simply says, "No," before starting to close it again. 

Jace catches the door. "Just hear us out." 

"I'd rather not," Raphael says blandly. 

"Please?" Simon asks hopefully. 

Raphael glances between them, then heaves a sigh as he takes a step back from the door. They enter silently, Simon shutting the door behind them. Jace takes a moment to look around, surprised by the soundproof foam tiles that line each wall. There are bookcases from floor to ceiling, each row full of books of all sizes, and there's a very,  _ very _ large bed in the center of the room with maroon silk sheets and a canopy to match. Candles flicker all over the room, dark sconces lining the walls, wax oh so slowly dripping down. 

"No one can hear us?" Jace asks, eyes drifting back to the bed. It's...very big. 

Raphael slowly raises an eyebrow. "No, they can't. I know what you're thinking, Jace, and it's never going to happen. You'll have to do much more than be my soulmate to be permitted entry to my bed, and even then, I won't so much as touch you." 

"Funny you should say that," Simon says awkwardly, clearing his throat. "Uh, so--"

"Simon, you are already aware of my sexuality. If you wish to have sex with each other, please do, but I don't care to join," Raphael says with a deep sigh. 

Jace rolls his eyes and steps up to the table a few feet from the door. There's a line of wine glasses that look like they're more for decoration than anything, and he scoops one up while reaching down to pull out his blade. Without so much as a breath of hesitation, he brings the blade down quickly, barely even wincing as the blood begins to flow and drip into the glass. Instantly, Simon and Raphael's heads snap up, fangs sliding out with the same simultaneous  _ snik.  _

"Here," Jace says once the wine glass is nearly too full and he's grown woozy. He holds it out to Raphael, blinking heavy and slow as he fumbles for his stele, waving it clumsily over his healing rune. "Drink it." 

Raphael's throat bobs on a harsh swallow. "What is this?" he hisses. "You  _ dare--"  _

"Trust me," Simon murmurs, stepping forward with an earnest expression on his face. "Trust  _ us."  _

Jace says nothing, just pushes the glass out to him more insistently. It's too late to go back now, and he's way past caring what this looks like. He can't help it. Just like Simon, if Raphael needs him, he's going to be there for him. It's not really a choice. 

Raphael slowly reaches out to take the glass, looking between them carefully. Then he catches Jace's gaze and holds it, bringing the glass to his lips and taking his very first sip. His dark eyes slip closed, and the softest of sighs leave his lips. Jace has to avert his eyes, heat swirling low in his gut, and he can't  _ believe  _ he's so fucking into two vampires enjoying his blood. That's wrong on so many levels, and he refuses to examine that particular trait. 

When he glances back up, Raphael is finishing the last drop, pulling the glass away and swiping the dab of red clinging to his bottom lip. Shit, Jace has never wanted to bite someone's bottom lip  _ this  _ bad, and what's worse is that the blood there isn't even a problem--if anything, it somehow makes it  _ sexier.  _ Jace doesn't even like blood!

Simon clears his throat once, twice, three times. 

"So?" Raphael regards them curiously, pausing to stick his thumb into his mouth, sucking off the blood that he caught from his bottom lip. Simon and Jace both suck in a sharp breath at the same time, and the corners of Raphael's mouth curls up slightly. "What was the point of giving me your blood? Is it a gift? Are you attempting to court me? Because you should know that--" 

In a flash, Simon is across the room, grabbing on thick slat covering the small window that Raphael has covered to block the sun. He snatches it down in one quick move that's also hotter than Jace is fully comfortable with, and sunlight comes pouring through the gap, barging into the room. Raphael makes a small sound of distress and starts to throw his hand up and back away, only to freeze in place when the sun doesn't harm him. 

When Simon sees Raphael's fright turn to wonder, he reaches up to tear down the rest of the slats, allowing more sunlight into the room. Breath escaping him in one great  _ whoosh,  _ Raphael steps forward into the path of the sun, staring with wide eyes as the light dances on his skin. 

"You can't tell anyone," Simon whispers, tone strangely grave, walking towards Raphael to try and snatch his attention. "Raphael, listen to me, you--you can't say anything about this to  _ anyone.  _ How it happened, who helped you. He's--he's our soulmate, and we have to protect him. Do you hear me? Raphael, are you listening to me?" 

Raphael slowly raises his hands, watching the sun drape over his fingers harmlessly, and he swallows thick. It looks like he might cry, actually, and Jace has to look away. His heart is doing something funny in his chest, and he berates it for being a fucking idiot. 

"Jace." Raphael is suddenly whirling around on the spot, flitting over to stand right in front of him, hovering just a bit too close. "This is your doing?" 

"Yes," Jace croaks. 

Raphael nods. "I won't tell anyone. I'll never ask anything of you in this regard. This stops with me." 

"Thank you," Jace tells him softly. 

"I believe it is I who should be thanking you." Raphael steps back, looking between Simon and Jace. "Both of you. This is… I cannot explain."

"You can go see Rosa," Simon murmurs gently. 

"What do I owe you?" Raphael asks them, looking down at the sun that splays out on his skin, marvelling at it. 

Jace tears his gaze away. "Nothing. I--we wanted you to have this. That's all." 

Raphael looks at him again. "Surely you must know that I'm forever in your debt. I can't begin to repay you--"

"No." Jace grimaces. "I didn't do it for that. Simon asked me to help, and I--I wanted to." 

"You asked?" Raphael murmurs, turning to look at Simon with some kind of emotion in his eyes. 

Simon shrugs awkwardly. "You know why." 

Raphael nods and looks down at his hands again, lips curling up just a bit, almost a smile that does a lot to Jace's insides. He glances away from that, unable to look at it, only for his eyes to land on Simon's happy grin, which isn't no fucking better. Jace wants to reach in his own chest and grasp his heart, keep it from fluttering around like a caged bird. 

"Visit Rosa with me," Raphael says suddenly. He looks confused by his own words, conflicted that he even wants that, and seconds from taking it back. 

"Yeah, okay," Simon says quickly, throwing Jace a warning look that isn't at all necessary. 

Jace clears his throat. "Sure." 

* * *

Rosa is a lovely woman with not much memory to cling to, and she has a very blatant crush on Jace. Raphael, of course, is completely bemused by this. Simon, on the other hand, is utterly delighted. And Jace...well, he finds himself charmed by Raphael's sister in no time. 

"Un hombre tan guapo," Rosa says with a bright smile, reaching up to tap Jace's cheek. "Ah ah, me harás desmayar." 

"Such a handsome man," Raphael translates through gritted teeth, scowling. "You'll make me swoon." 

Jace grins. 

The visit goes extremely well, considering the fact that Raphael had asked them to join on a whim. Rosa takes to him and Simon almost immediately, speaking mostly in Spanish because English has started to slip from her memory. Raphael speaks with her in soft Spanish, walking alongside her slowly, everything about him gentle and caring. It's a side of him that Jace isn't expecting, and it leaves him breathless far too often. 

Simon chatters on, making Rosa laugh more than what must be usual because Raphael always looks so surprised when she does--though that could be because he can't see how she finds Simon funny, which...fair. And they spend a good portion of the day with her, which seems to make her very happy. She even comments on how nice it is to see Raphael in the daytime, which makes Raphael look close to tears again, only for her to go on to say that she had a brother named Raphael, who she misses terribly, and that makes him blink harsh and quick. 

Overall, though, Raphael seems lighter when they leave. He's still quietly stunned about being in the sun, almost amazed by it, occasionally tilting his head back to inhale deeply and just soak it in. 

No one comments on the fact that they all just go back to Hotel Dumort together, even though they have no reason to stay in each other's company. The fact that Raphael just accepts it, allowing them back into his room without a word, is very telling. Jace doesn't let himself expect anything, or hope for it, but even still, he finds his gaze latching onto the bed as soon as the door shuts behind them. Raphael catches him. 

"You've earned it," Raphael tells him. "If you wanted, you could get in my bed."

Jace coughs. "No, that's--it's…" 

"Simon as well," Raphael tacks on. 

"Oh, awesome!" Simon chirps, blurring across the room to flop down on the bed, starfishing across it and releasing a deep sigh. "Jace, dude, you're missing out. Raphael does  _ not  _ skimp on his own comfort, lemme tell ya. This bed is amazing." 

Raphael comes to a halt beside Jace, looking at him almost curiously. "You wish to join him." 

Jace  _ really  _ fucking does. "Nah," he says, "I'm good." 

"Go," Raphael says firmly, tipping his head towards the bed, eyes very serious. "I'm not asking." 

"Raphael--" 

"I can toss you on it if you prefer, but you could save us from that inelegance." 

Jace wisely doesn't argue with that, rolling his eyes and heaving a sigh as he shuffles over to the bed. Simon scoots over to make room, curling around a pillow and dragging his fingers over the velvet pillowcase, humming his approval. Throat dry, Jace sits down on the edge of the bed, one hand coming down to stroke the silk sheets, bottom lip caught between his teeth. 

"It's nice, right?" Simon asks, sitting up and peering at him with a grin. "Could you imagine sleeping in this bed? I'd never leave it. And having sex on here would--" 

His words cut off abruptly, and his eyes go wide as his hands fist the silk sheets. Jace very pointedly looks away, refusing to comment, a curl of desire hot and sharp in his gut. His heart thumps unevenly, and he knows they must hear it, but he's hoping they'll just politely ignore it. When he glances up, Raphael has settled into the chair in the corner of the room, in direct contact with sunlight, and his fingers lightly press into his lips as he watches them thoughtfully. 

"Desire is a very complex concept," Raphael says, pulling his hand down and rubbing his fingers together, the motion of it mesmerizing. "For most of my young life, I never felt it as people frequently do. I craved for my family's happiness, of course, sought out my own peace, hoped to please the Lord. Yet, I never understood true desire until I became a vampire. Having never experienced lust before, a deep craving for blood made me feel...disgusted." 

Jace can't take his eyes off Raphael's hand, fixated on how his fingers methodically rub together. "Bloodlust isn't that much farther from regular lust, often going hand-in-hand. You must have been confused." 

Raphael smiles humorlessly. "I was, as well as deeply angry. I felt inept often, unsure how I could yearn for something so monstrous, but couldn't find it within myself to desire another." He flicks his fingers lazily, then goes right back to rubbing them together. "I had sex, often and with many partners, but I quickly learned that it wasn't something that interested me. I didn't waste my time with it. Though I  _ can  _ have sex, and will if I decide to, I've never have the urge. It bores me. I garner more enjoyment from a good book." 

"Always down for a good book," Simon quips, offering Raphael a broad smile. His eyes are soft. "Ya know, I was like fifteen when I figured out I liked guys as well as girls. Threw me for a loop, and my mom, and Clary. They were supportive, obviously, but it was a strange time." 

Raphael tilts his head slowly, fingers circling and rubbing, circling and rubbing. "I'm not explaining my sexuality to you. I'm making a point. Sex doesn't interest me, so I don't often do it. But sex does interest the both of you, specifically sex with each other. So, why is it that you deny yourselves?" 

The room goes silent. Jace snatches his gaze from Raphael's hypnotic fingers, looking into his eyes, breath caught in his chest. He can feel how frozen Simon is behind him, so still that he's not even breathing. Jace joins him in holding his breath, but eventually inhales sharply because he's the human who needs working lungs and Simon is not. Raphael sighs. 

"Very well," he says, pushing to his feet. 

Jace watches him approach, eyes following him as he walks past with purpose. Without warning, he puts his knee on the bed, reaches out to grasp Simon's cheeks, and dips down to kiss him. Jace instantly looks away, only for his traitorous eyes to slide back over, and his mouth goes dry as he shamelessly watches. 

Raphael kisses Simon efficiently, taking him apart without even working that hard. He doesn't touch him anywhere else, simply cradles his face and kisses him deeply. Simon makes a small sound in the back of his throat and reaches out with shaking fingers to grip Raphael's shirt, head tipped back as Raphael calmly pushes him to lose all sense of himself with nothing more than the swipe of his tongue. 

When he pulls away, Simon whimpers, and Jace has to swallow the sound of his own. His fingers are gripping the covers so hard now that his knuckles ache. 

"Raphael, what--" Simon stops, chest heaving even though he doesn't need to breathe, and his eyes bulge when Raphael turns on the spot, reaching out for Jace to kiss him as well. "Oh my g--holy  _ shit."  _

Jace can relate. Raphael telegraphs his movements so that Jace can stop him, but he doesn't. He just parts his lips and waits, heart thundering in his chest, a deep ache of want coursing through his veins. Raphael leans down, presses his lips to Jace's, and then proceeds to kiss him far more filthily than he's prepared for. Raphael licks into the seam his mouth, hot tongue sliding over his, teeth catching his bottom lip and biting slightly too hard. Jace can't stop the sound that escapes his throat then, and his whole body is quivering when Raphael pulls away. 

"That was nice," Raphael comments casually, unaffected entirely, and he drops his hands from Jace's face, looking between them. "Now, you're both clearly interested in sex, so please...continue." 

With that, Raphael turns around and goes back to his chair, rubbing his fucking fingers together again like that's not actively driving Jace insane. 

"Holy shit," Simon chokes out again. 

Jace doesn't move from his spot, mouth feeling sewn shut. He can't speak and his mind is eerily quiet. He doesn't know what to say or do, and Simon is no fucking help. The only person who seems to know what to do is Raphael, except he's just telling them to fuck. That's a bad idea. Right? 

Raphael sighs again, annoyed this time. "I don't understand why you refrain. I feel no sexual desire, but I do find myself curious what will happen. You'd be hermoso together. Beautiful." 

Simon clears his throat. "Raphael, maybe--" 

"Remove Jace's jacket," Raphael interrupts, leaning back in his chair, waiting with one leg crossed over the other. 

There's a resounding silence that neither of them break. Raphael waits patiently, watching them, rubbing his fingers together over and over, over and over, over and  _ fucking _ over. Simon shifts on the bed, and Jace's heart picks up speed. He reaches up to push his jacket off his shoulders halfway, leaning back to give Simon to space to remove it fully. After a moment, Simon does.

The jacket hits the floor with a swish of leather against thick carpet, and Jace swallows. 

"Remove your shoes and socks, both of you," Raphael murmurs, still just  _ looking  _ at them. 

Jace immediately leans down to start loosening his boots, listening to Simon kick off his converse. The boots settle on the floor with a dull thump, and Jace carefully peels off his socks. He feels vulnerable, suddenly, with his bare feet on display to the last two men he'd ever expected to see them. Raphael looks, but doesn't seem to care, and Simon doesn't even glance over, too busy wiggling his own toes. Jace takes a deep breath. 

Raphael hums. "Simon, remove your shirt." 

Jace tries with all his might not to look, but lasts only a few moments before he glances over. Simon is pale but solid, and Jace has never truly appreciated a man's physique like this before. But fuck, Simon looks  _ good.  _ When he glances up, Simon is looking at him, catching him in the act, and Jace flicks his gaze away, focusing on the smooth motion of Raphael's fingers. 

"Touch him." Raphael's fingers stop briefly, waving through the air, then starts right back up. "Jace, touch him." 

For a long moment, Jace doesn't think he's going to be able to do it. He can't fathom  _ why  _ they're doing this, what it is they're even fucking doing right now. But, despite that, he still finds himself turning slightly, holding his breath as he reaches out to touch Simon. The pads of his fingers drifts over his side, across his stomach, tracing the jutting bone of his hip. His mouth is so fucking  _ dry. _

Simon's hands clench into fists at his sides, and his bottom lip gets caught between his teeth. His eyes are brown and lovely, warm and full of heat, and Jace feels like he might implode from holding his gaze. But, try as he might, he can't look away either. 

Over and over, his mind chants,  _ what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the--  _

"Simon, get him out of his shirt. Expose him as you are, but quickly," Raphael says calmly, as if he's commenting on the weather. "Use your speed." 

Jace's hands are briefly displaced and he feels his hair ruffle from an unknown breeze. Simon holds his shirt in his hands, and Jace can feel the warmth from the sun in the room leaching into his skin. He doesn't know why that's so unbearably enticing, to know that Simon is that fast, to know that they both are. Why is he attracted to vampires? What the fuck is  _ wrong  _ with him?

He has no idea what he's doing. This is probably the  _ last  _ thing he should be indulging in, and it probably shouldn't be so fucking captivating. He feels sucked into it, existing only here and now, a mere puppet on Raphael's strings, doing his bidding. He doesn't know what that makes Simon, all he's aware of is that he's never wanted anyone as much as he wants these two. 

"Kiss him, cariño," Raphael murmurs, and he doesn't specify who he's talking to, but Simon reacts instantly. 

Jace only gets to release a short, shaky breath before Simon's lips are on his, and  _ fuck,  _ he is not prepared. Between Raphael's kiss and his direction, Jace is wound so tight that he feels seconds from shattering. Simon kissing him makes him immediately go loose and curl into it with a small whine that he barely recognizes from himself. Simon reverberates the sound back to him, rougher and more breathless, and Jace swallows it. 

For a long time, Raphael says nothing. He sits quietly while Jace and Simon plunder each other's mouths, but his presence doesn't disappear entirely. Jace is still aware of him, even as he arches up into Simon's hands, clawing at his shoulders to pull him closer. Desire swirls within him, and he's so hard that it almost hurts. 

"Stop," Raphael says firmly, and they break apart automatically. "Simon, go to my nightstand and grab the lubricant there." That earns him a strange look from both of them, even Simon while he moves to do as he was told, and Raphael rolls his eyes. "I use it to shine my shoes, if you must know. It works very well." 

Simon obtains the lube and holds it with shaking hands, looking at Raphael expectantly. It occurs to Jace then that maybe Simon's depending on Raphael for this just as much as he is. The thought isn't an unwelcome one. 

Raphael waves his hand lazily. "Return to my bed," he says while rubbing his fingers together once more, and why is it so fucking hot that they're doing this in  _ his  _ bed? "Jace, get undressed fully. Simon, you too. Do not help each other, do not touch." 

Jace breathes out shakily, pushing to his feet to do as Raphael says. He pauses to make sure that it's okay if he stands, then  _ immediately  _ feels fucking insane for checking. Even still, when Raphael nods at him, giving him the go-ahead, Jace feels warmth bloom in his chest. 

What the  _ fuck  _ is happening? 

He slowly unbuckles his belt, eyes drawn to Simon kicking his way out of his pants quickly. He wants to touch, he realizes, but can't because Raphael said not to, and  _ why?  _ Fucking why? Jace can't understand why he's so intent on listening to Raphael, why they both are. Together, they get naked, watching each other with an eagerness to touch, and yet they hold off all because their other soulmate told them they couldn't. 

Once they stand there, wearing nothing, dicks standing at attention, Raphael murmurs a soft, "Hermoso. Truly, you both are. Kiss him again, Simon." 

Without missing a beat, Simon reaches out to cup Jace's neck, stepping forward and kissing him with heat. Jace opens up to him immediately, all the questions and incredulity in his mind evaporating. Simon's tongue slides along his bottom lip, and Jace suddenly can't even  _ think  _ as Simon slips into the heat of his mouth. His body feels like it's on fire, tingles and shudders running circuits beneath his skin. The groan he loses hold on is muffled into their kiss, and Simon hums in response. 

Raphael just lets it happen, doesn't stop it, says nothing as they draw closer together. Before long, Jace has his hands in Simon's hair, tugging him closer desperately, and Simon's nails are lightly with dragging down his sides, not too hard but enough to leave a mark. 

"Is it good, Jace?" Raphael asks, almost politely curious. 

Jace breaks away from the kiss in a daze, his voice cracking when he rasps a broken, "Yes. Fuck yes." 

"You look ready to fall apart," Raphael comments, sounding amused. "Doesn't he, Simon? What do you think?" 

"He--he looks wrecked," Simon whispers, bringing his thumb up to press against Jace's lips, his breath hitching when Jace mindlessly nips at it. "He's pretty. So pretty."

"Do you want to be wrecked, Jace? Ruined?" 

_ "Yes,"  _ Jace croaks out, eyes sinking shut, and fucking hell, he's so far gone that it's pathetic. 

Raphael hums, chuckling. "Tell us, mi sol, do you want Simon to fuck you? He will. Won't you, cariño?" 

In unison, at the exact same time, Simon and Jace both moan out an emphatic, "Yes!" 

"Good. Simon, do you know how to prepare him?" 

"Yeah, I've done it before." 

"To someone else?" 

"Yeah, and myself." 

"I see." Raphael releases an amused noise, then chuckles when Simon and Jace shift restlessly. "La paciencia. You will need it, both of you. Jace, lie on your back, get comfortable, this will take a while. Simon, be slow and careful, do not stop until I tell you." 

Jace moves back to the bed, breathing heavily, anticipation making his mind foggy and his heart race. He arranges himself as Raphael had ordered, sprawling out on his back with a pillow beneath his hips, settling with his fingers twisting in the sheets. There's no awkward fumbling or talking or figuring out what needs to be done--they simply follow the tasks Raphael's given them, trusting him to lead them into pleasure. 

Just as Jace had, Simon does as he's told. He pops the cap on the lube, and that's precisely when Jace closes his eyes. He gives himself over to sensation, panting as Simon's dry hand parts his left knee and cups beneath it, pushing it up and to the side. Like this, Jace is open and exposed for both Simon and Raphael to see. Simon sucks in a sharp breath between his teeth. Raphael is silent.

This has never happened to him before, so the first press of a cold finger against his hole makes him tense up. From the corner of the room, Raphael's smooth tone tells him to relax, and Jace does. 

The time after blurs together. Simon does exactly as Raphael told him to, goes slow and careful, never once causing Jace pain. There is discomfort and the adjustment at the intrusion, but it doesn't  _ hurt.  _ And before long, it actually starts to feel good. Like,  _ really  _ good, to the point that Jace's hands are grasping at the silk sheets for dear life. 

Distantly, there's the sound of a page turning.

Simon keeps right on going. His hand must be aching, and Jace is pretty sure he's ready enough for what comes next. Raphael still hasn't said anything though, so they continue on. It reaches the point where Simon's fingers slip in and out with ease, and Jace is  _ frustrated.  _ His dick is weeping, precum pearling at the tip, sticking to his stomach. Every few presses in, Simon curls his fingers and Jace feels it--that lightening strike of pleasure that makes him jolt and such in a sharp breath. 

Suddenly, Jace can't help it, can't hold it back, just needs more, and he keens out a whimpering plea. "Raphael,  _ please.  _ Just--just…" 

Raphael's book snaps shut and he hums. "Yes, very well. Simon, you may fuck him. Start slow and only go faster when he begs. Begin gentle and only go harder when he moans for you. Do  _ not  _ touch him below his waist." 

"Oh, thank fuck," Simon breathes out, immediately removing his hand and lining himself up. 

Jace's jaw unhinges as Simon slowly presses his way inside, filling him, going achingly slow. He takes it, not making a sound, not even breathing, simply  _ feeling.  _ And fuck, it feels  _ perfect.  _

Simon grunts and pulls out carefully, his movements a long drag of torture. Jace reaches up to hold onto his arms, digging his nails in, and Simon releases a soft moan that fills the entirety of Jace's thoughts. The pace set, they break apart and come back together at Raphael's leisure. Jace clenches around Simon, a low whine locked behind his teeth, and Simon sounds as if his breath has just punched out of him. 

Jace takes it for as long as he can, until his limbs are shaking, until every cell in his body cries out for more, until he can't handle it anymore. "Okay, fuck,  _ okay.  _ Please, Simon, I'm--fuck, please just... _ fuck me."  _

"Simon, tell him thank you," Raphael murmurs. "It's only polite." 

Simon sucks in a deep gasp of air and picks up the pace, rocking in and out of Jace faster, making sure to keep his movements gentle. "Yeah, yeah,  _ fuck.  _ G--shit, Jace, thank you. You're perfect, you--you feel  _ so  _ good." 

"Come on, Simon,  _ come on.  _ Fuck me!" 

"Can't. Moan for me first. Moan my name." 

_ "Simon,"  _ Jace moans, a frazzled mess of want and obedience. He's so far into it, into  _ them,  _ that he's willing to listen. To both, to whatever they want. 

Simon immediately fucks into him hard, slamming forward roughly, just like Jace has been aching for. He cries out, chest heaving, nails scraping down Simon's sides far too harshly. Now that he's been given permission, Simon fucks him hard and fast, unrelenting as he pounds into him over and over, and Jace gasps and claws at him desperately. 

It feels so fucking  _ good.  _

He can feel it building within him, that wave of release slowly approaching, making his toes curl. He's going to fucking  _ scream  _ if he doesn't let it crash over him, but it's held back by too many things. Simon can't touch his dick, and Raphael hasn't said he could. Furthermore, Raphael hasn't said they can come at all. 

"Like art," Raphael whispers, his voice coming from much closer than the chair. "A masterpiece." 

Jace chokes on a sound, a syllable,  _ something _ and flings his head to the side, blinking his eyes open to see Raphael crouched beside the bed, watching them. 

"Please?" Jace asks, unsure what he's even begging for at this point, lost in the feeling of Simon fucking into him. 

Simon groans rough and loud. "Raphael, let--let me touch him." 

"Where would you like to be touched, Jace?" Raphael asks smoothly. His arms are braced on his bent legs, fingers rubbing together, and that makes Jace moan and look away. "Above your waist, of course." 

"H--hair," Jace wheezes, back arching when Simon hits the perfect angle and sends pleasure shooting through him. "My hair.  _ Pull it.  _ Please." 

Raphael lightly clicks his tongue. "He's a naughty boy, no? He's asked so nicely, Simon, you probably should." 

"Should or can?" Simon gasps out, hands twitching against Jace's sides, his words breathless. 

"Mm, you can do what you like above the waist. He's laid out for you, is he not?" 

"Oh my fucking--" Simon cuts himself off, fumbling with shaking fingers to press his hands up Jace's chest, baring down on him. He switches up immediately, reaching out to lock Jace's wrists in his grip, shoving forward to pin his arms to the bed. His hips move faster and harder. "Jace. Fuck,  _ Jace." _

Jace can feel tears prick at the back of his eyes, the peak of pleasure almost becoming too much. He's no longer just on the edge, he's hanging by his last thread, and he's never needed release as much as he does in this moment. He bites down hard on his bottom lip, so hard that blood hits his tongue, and he gets to hear both Raphael and Simon suck in sharp breaths. 

Simon keeps his wrists pressed firmly to the bed with one hand, the other sliding down to gently thread through Jace's hair. Finally, his fingers fist into the strands and tug sharply, making him tilt his head back, which leads him to inevitably worry at his bottom lip even more, bringing more blood beading to the surface. 

"You may come," Raphael says suddenly. 

Then, without preamble, Raphael's cool hand comes to grip Jace's chin hard. It has to be him because Simon's hands are on him elsewhere. And it's Raphael who leans over him from the side, tongue sliding out to lick the blood from his bottom lip, his own soft mouth sucking Jace's lip in and making it throb. 

His whole body shudders as he comes untouched, release hitting him square in his core, washing over him so intensely that he lets out a broken sob when Raphael pulls away. Simon's hips stutter abruptly, then he pulls out, gasping for breath as he finds his release too. 

Jace closes his eyes and drifts on the cloud of bliss that comes from an orgasm like that one. The kind that rips out of you, making your ears ring, making your mind one buzz of white-noise. He barely feels it when Simon lets his hands go and pets his hair, barely even registers someone cleaning his chest. He lays there, limp and spent, not a fucking thought in his mind. 

When he eventually comes back to himself, Simon is lying curled in his side, naked and cool against him. Jace blinks at him, and Simon smiles. 

"Hi," he murmurs. 

"Hey," Jace replies dumbly. "Raphael?" 

"Over here, mi sol," Raphael calls out, now back in his chair, reading his book. "That was good, you see. You'll both have to do it again, even on your own." 

Simon frowns. "Without you?" 

"Sometimes," Raphael says conversationally. "Though, there will be as many times that I'll be here for. The next time, I should sketch you." 

"You can draw?" Jace mumbles. 

Raphael hums. "I've lived longer than most, so I've found ways to spend my time. I'm quite good." 

"You can't show anybody," Simon says. 

"Of course not," Raphael agrees. "I wouldn't share either of you with anyone but each other." 

Jace is trying to follow the conversation, but he's so  _ tired,  _ and everything within him feels incomplete. He frowns over at Raphael. "Will you lay down with us?" 

Raphael looks up, considering them, his gaze calm and accessing. "When I finish my chapter," he finally murmurs. "Can you wait until then?" 

"Yes," Jace answers immediately. 

"Good. And Simon?" 

"How long is this chapter?" Simon asks weakly. 

"I have four more pages." 

"Oh. Well, yeah, okay." 

Four pages later, Raphael is closing his book with a snap, and both Jace and Simon scoot to the side unison, opening up the middle for him to crawl into. Raphael does, somehow managing to be graceful when he settles into bed between them, rolling his eyes when they both instantly curl into him. He doesn't push them away though; just the opposite. 

He pulls them closer. 

* * *

Jace is doing his best to keep calm. Standing outside of Magnus and Alec's apartment, he paces back and forth, alternating between scratching both wrists. 

"Are we ever going to go in?" Simon whispers. 

Raphael sighs. "Give him a moment." 

Jace continues to pace, wracking his brain for any other solution besides this one. There has to be some other way to approach this situation than what they're planning to do now. Hell, he hasn't even gotten to warn Alec yet. But his wrists are red and itching, and he can now clear this whole building in less than ten seconds. 

Jace comes to a halt. "Maybe--" 

"Mi sol," Raphael says gently, pulling out the big guns. Jace's fucking pet name that shouldn't be so fucking sweet but is anyway--my sun, it means, and Raphael regularly says it now because he's a softie and literally sees Jace as the reason he's a Daylighter, which is technically true. "This is the only way, you know this." 

"I know, but--but maybe…" Jace trails off, searching for some other alternative. "What if we--" 

"Jace," Simon interrupts, reaching out to grab his hand, squeezing it gently, "it's going to be fine." 

"Fuck." Jace scrubs his free hand over his eyebrow, chest tight with discomfort. "I didn't even  _ like  _ either of you three days ago."

"I still don't like either of you," Raphael says, because he's a big fucking liar. 

Jace  _ knows  _ that's not true because Raphael's probably the most romantic out of all of them. He got Simon two letter keychains--J and R--for no other reason than because he went into a store he'd never been into since it closed before dark. Simon, the next biggest sap, has them hanging off his keys. Jace, the least sappy of them all, definitely didn't have to blink back tears when this all played out in front of his eyes, definitely not. 

"Liar, liar, fangs caught on wire," Simon teases. 

Jace closes his eyes and sighs. "How? How did I get saddled with the two of  _ you?"  _

"Good luck?" Simon suggests. 

"A blessing from God," Raphael murmurs. "Meanwhile, he has forsaken me again and left me to deal with you two idiotas." 

"You know," Simon mutters, "I like you a lot more when you're telling me exactly how to fuck Jace." 

And it's at this precise moment that the door opens, revealing Magnus, who comes to a halt and blinks out at them in surprise. His eyebrows slowly creep up his forehead, and yeah, there's no way he didn't catch that. 

"Aleeec," Magnus calls out over his shoulder, not looking away from them, "you're not going to  _ believe  _ who's at our door and what I just caught them talking about." 

"Kill me now," Jace chokes out, mortified. 

"That could be arranged," Raphael says lightly, then smiles at Magnus. "Good morning. Lovely day out, no?" 

Magnus blinks at him. "Yeah. Awfully, uh, bright. No offense, but how are you alive?" 

"You could say I was finally blessed by an angel," Raphael tells him, deadpan, his delivery  _ perfect.  _

Simon and Jace crack up, despite the moment. 

"Who is it?" Alec asks, suddenly appearing at the door, blinking out at them. "Oh. Jace, hey. What...are you doing with Simon and--wait. Raphael? Aren't you supposed to be burnt to a crisp?" 

Magnus lightly smacks his shoulder. "He said he was blessed by angels. Also, apparently Simon fucks Jace and Raphael tells him exactly how to do it." 

"He-- _ what?"  _ Alec does a double-take, eyes bulging while he tries to figure out who he wants to gape at. He eventually settles on Jace, realization dawning bright in his eyes. "Wait,  _ wait,  _ these are the two soulmates you wanted but couldn't have?" 

"Two soulmates?" Magnus murmurs, eyebrows jerking up in blatant surprise. 

Alec throws him a quick look. "It never came up, sorry."

"Mi sol," Raphael says in amusement, lips curling up, "you  _ wanted  _ us?" 

"My sun," Magnus tells Alec in a whisper. "He's already given them pet names, which means he's in deep. Bet you twenty bucks that Simon is cariño, which is just  _ darling  _ in Spanish because he takes after me."

"Just--just _ look,"  _ Jace hisses, a blush crawling up his neck hot and quick. He flips his wrists over to show Magnus and Alec the irritated skin. "This happened when we, uh...well, when we--" 

"No, we know," Alec says quickly. 

Magnus eyes Raphael. "You're having--" 

"No," Raphael tells him, shaking his head. "My participation was merely...instructional." 

"Well, that's interesting. If there ever was a question of whether penetration was required for the connection to become deeper or not, it's answered." Magnus makes a considering noise and tips his head from side-to-side, then sighs at Alec's confused look. "Raphael doesn't get hot and bothered for anyone and rarely has sex." 

"The term is asexual," Simon puts in. 

Jace clears his throat.  _ "Anyway,  _ what the hell is happening to us? I can run, like, really fast? Simon and Raphael can hold my Seraph Blade? Am I going to have to drink blood? Can they eat?" 

"I suppose you probably  _ could  _ drink blood if you wanted to, though I doubt it will hold any nutritional value for you. Might taste good, though." Magnus waves a hand at Simon and Raphael. "The same basis goes for them with food, I imagine." 

"And it's like me and Magnus. I got some of his traits, like magic, and he got some of mine," Alec explains. He pauses, then clears his throat. "You're probably immortal now too, Jace. So, that's nice." 

Jace's heart stumbles in his chest, breath hitching. Immortal. Forever. A long time of this, of being with Simon and Raphael, of having his soulmates. 

Fuck, that makes him so  _ happy.  _

"Well, this solves my issue with you dying," Raphael comments casually, turning his wrists up to display both irritated names, his eyebrows raised. "What did I tell you? I value symmetry. It's just how things are meant to be." 

"Right," Jace whispers, "that was the issue." 

"So...we're gonna be okay?" Simon asks, flicking his gaze over Jace with a small frown. 

Alec nods. "Better than, even. Jace and I are both immortal now, so neither of us will suffer the loss of a parabatai bond and it's highly unlikely we'll lose a soulmate." He throws Jace a pointed look. "This is a  _ good  _ thing. Plus, the new bond is so rare and--" 

"Okay," Raphael cuts in firmly, "we no longer care. We must be going." 

"C'mon, Jace," Simon mumbles, tugging on the hand he's still holding, pulling him down the hallway. 

"Well, we were leaving  _ anyway,"  _ Magnus calls after them, huffing, though he sounds amused. They can hear what he says next to Alec. "They all do seem well-suited for each other, don't they? Strangely enough, I think they will love each other very much." 

Raphael leads them out into the street, taking a moment to blink up into the sunshine, then turns to face them with a small frown. "Jace, if you're unhappy, we will figure out some way to--" 

"What?" Jace blinks. "You--you think I'm  _ upset?"  _

"You got quiet," Simon points out, fidgeting nervously with his and Jace's entwined fingers. 

"I was thinking," Jace says. 

"Requires effort for you, I know," Raphael says, seemingly unable to hold it in. When Jace doesn't even crack a smile, he sighs. "What is it? The _moment_ you learned you were to be immortal, you shut down." 

Simon rubs soothing circles in the back of his hand, his gaze soft. "If you're not happy with it, that's okay. You don't have to pretend to be for our sake."

Jace clears his throat and looks away, wishing suddenly that he was being pushed to the brink of orgasm once more at Raphael's guidance. He knows that he'd be able to say this without struggling if he were, would be able to moan and whimper it out with no problems. But, here and now, he has to choose to open himself up on his own, rather than handing himself over to them and letting them do it for him. 

Jace swallows. "I--I don't think I've ever been this happy, actually," he admits in a croak.

They stare at him, taking in his words, and Jace wishes the ground would open up and swallow him whole. He's  _ mortified,  _ but they also deserve to hear it. When he glances back, Raphael and Simon's faces have softened so much that his does it in knee-jerk response. He's in so deep already and it's only been three days. 

"Oh, mi sol," Raphael murmurs, stepping forward to lean in and press a soft kiss to his lips. 

Jace closes his eyes and accepts it. When Raphael pulls away, Simon ducks in to steal a chaste kiss too. 

"We've got forever to make you happier," Simon says fondly, his words tender and sweet. 

Jace doesn't say anything, doesn't ask them how, doesn't get lost in his own head trying to work out what will come with time. He just reaches out to curl his free hand into Raphael's, tethering them all together, and his heart swells in his chest. They don't know it, but they've already done it, made him even happier with just this, here and now, giving him themselves. 

He's never been more at peace. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope y'all enjoyed it! If you did, don't hesitate to drop off some kudos and please leave a comment; I genuinely love them!
> 
> Ta!
> 
> -SOBS


End file.
